the tree is lit-up, housing presents for me and literally only me (awk) and meanwhile i am being forced yet again to take pre-med classes for another semester!!!!! what a happy holiday time this is.
Sunday, December 22, 2013
Saturday, December 21, 2013
that went excruciatingly badly.
i don't know how bad to feel about my private education and the fact that my parents think i'm throwing it away because i want a career in design. the stress of this entire situation is making me unable to do anything, and channeling energy into anything besides work and sleep is daunting and seemingly impossible. my education has had a huge impact on who i am as a person and that place of privilege has given me many opportunities. my 'stubbornness' in not wanting to be a doctor or engineer is neither a positive or a negative, and i don't think i should feel guilty about wandering outside the #realm of those two professions. i shouldn't be afraid to fail. i shouldn't have my mom tell me to my face that i don't love my parents and that i am a 'stupid toddler'. and yet all of these things are happening and i do feel bad about them.
i don't know how bad to feel about my private education and the fact that my parents think i'm throwing it away because i want a career in design. the stress of this entire situation is making me unable to do anything, and channeling energy into anything besides work and sleep is daunting and seemingly impossible. my education has had a huge impact on who i am as a person and that place of privilege has given me many opportunities. my 'stubbornness' in not wanting to be a doctor or engineer is neither a positive or a negative, and i don't think i should feel guilty about wandering outside the #realm of those two professions. i shouldn't be afraid to fail. i shouldn't have my mom tell me to my face that i don't love my parents and that i am a 'stupid toddler'. and yet all of these things are happening and i do feel bad about them.
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